«When mom found my diaphragm, I told her it was a bathing cap for my cat.»

«Shaw is like a train. One just speaks the words and sits in one's place. But Shakespeare is like bathing in the sea - one swims where one wants.»

«The motion picture is like a picture of a lady in a half-piece bathing suit. If she wore a few more clothes, you might be intrigued. If she wore no clothes at all, you might be shocked. But the way it is, you are occupied with noticing that her knees are too bony and that her toenails are too large. The modern film tries too hard to be real. Its techniques of illusion are so perfect that it requires no contribution form the audience but a mouthful of popcorn.»

«The right honourable gentleman [Sir Robert Peel] caught the Whigs bathing and walked away with their clothes.»

«ZANZIBARI, n. An inhabitant of the Sultanate of Zanzibar, off the eastern coast of Africa. The Zanzibaris, a warlike people, are best known in this country through a threatening diplomatic incident that occurred a few years ago. The American consul at the capital occupied a dwelling that faced the sea, with a sandy beach between. Greatly to the scandal of this official's family, and against repeated remonstrances of the official himself, the people of the city persisted in using the beach for bathing. One day a woman came down to the edge of the water and was stooping to remove her attire (a pair of sandals) when the consul, incensed beyond restraint, fired a charge of bird-shot into the most conspicuous part of her person. Unfortunately for the existing _entente cordiale_ between two great nations, she was the Sultana.»

«This race between Dick Swett and Bob Smith is hot and tight as a too-small bathing suit on a too-long car ride back from the beach.»

«Reading their books over and over again, people continue making mistakes; they are so proud of their religious robes. But what is the use of bathing at sacred shrines of pilgrimage, when the filth of stubborn pride is within the mind?»

«They walk on the Lord's Path, and inspire others to walk on the Lord's Path as well. Bathing in a pool of holy water, they are washed clean of filth. But, by bathing in a stagnant pond, they are contaminated with even more filth.»

«The Guru is the ocean, and all His Teachings are the river. Bathing within it, glorious greatness is obtained.»

«This body is the residence of God. The food you take is the offering you make to him. Your act of bathing is the ceremonial bathing of Him who is in You. The ground you walk on is His domain. The joy you gain is His gift. The grief you experience is His lesson. Remember Him ever, in sun and rain, day and night, asleep and awake.»