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Letter "D" » David Letterman Quotes
(Click a letter to view the authors)
«The Security and Exchanges Commission is going to be investigating Vice President Dick Cheney. They'll begin that investigation as soon as Congress finishes investigating the Security and Exchanges Commission.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
Cheney, commission, commissioned, dick, Dick Cheney, exchanges, finishes, investigating, investigation, vice president
«Everyone has this sense of togetherness right now. For example, one guy on the subway today, he wanted to share my pants.»
«Yesterday Senator John Kerry changed his mind and now supports the ban on gay marriages. I'm telling you this guy has more positions than Paris Hilton.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
ban, banned, gay marriage, Hilton, John Kerry, Kerry, Marriages, Paris, Paris Hilton, positions, senator, Senator John Kerry, supports, Telling You, This guy
«Today is a big day in TV history. On this day forty-one years ago, the Beverly Hillbillies aired for the first time right here on CBS. They took a little break, then in 1992, they moved into the White House for eight years.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
aired, Beverly, CBS, forty-one, Hillbillies, hillbilly, On This Day, right here
«Hillary Clinton, our junior senator from New York, announced that she has no intentions of ever, ever running for office of the President of the United States. Her husband, Bill Clinton, is bitterly disappointed. He is crushed. There go his dreams of becoming a two-impeachment family.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
announced, bill, Bill Clinton, bitterly, Clinton, crushed, Her husband, Hillary, Hillary Clinton, impeachment, intentions, junior, juniors, New York State, Office of, President of, President of the, President of the United, President of the United States, senator
«The weather here is gorgeous. It's mild and feels like it's in the eighties. The hot dog vendors got confused because of the weather and thought it was spring, so they accidentally changed the hot dog water in their carts.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
accidentally, carts, eighties, hot dog, hot dogs, hot weather, mild, vendor, water dog
«Congratulations are in order for Woody Allen - he and Soon Yi have a brand new baby daughter. It's all part of Woody's plan to grow his own wives.»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| About:
Babies
| Keywords:
Allen, brand, Brand New, congratulation, congratulations, woody, Woody Allen
«No one knows if Saddam is still alive. They keep showing old footage of him on TV saying that it's live. You know, it's like the same thing we do with Dick Cheney.»
«Ted Kennedy is endorsing John Kerry and I'm wondering, do you really want the endorsement of a guy with a Bloody Mary mustache?»
Author: David Letterman
(Comedian, Host)
| Keywords:
bloody, Bloody Mary, endorse, endorsed, endorsement, john, John Kennedy, John Kerry, Kennedy, Kerry, Mary, Mary I, mustache, Ted, Ted Kennedy, wondering
«Iraq's elite Republican Guard is doing so badly they're changing their name to the Democratic Guard.»
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